In Perfect Equilibrium
by Tywyllwch Prydferth
Summary: Neither Cameron nor House had a record for stable relationships but can two broken halves really stay intact and find equilibrium? Multi chapter fic set shortly after the end of season 4 so spoilers present. Hameron eventually.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** Once again, I own nothing.

**Summary:** Neither Cameron nor House had a record for stable relationships but can two broken halves really stay intact and find equilibrium? Multi chapter fic set shortly after the end of season 4 so spoilers present. Hameron eventually. Rating for language and adult themes in later chapters.

* * *

Cameron pulled her bedcovers tighter around her, craving the little comfort it offered. Despite being in this situation so many times in the past, it still hurt. She'd get over it of course, she always did, but as time went on the chances of her ever finding any stability in her life was starting to look slim. Letting out a sigh, the nights events replayed in her mind once again.

-

"_You knew I was going for the job"_

"_I know Rob but I just didn't think you'd make the decision so soon" Cameron replied, pacing around the living room that she shared with her fiancée. Chase walked up to her, hands placed tenderly either side of her, stopping her agitated movements._

"_Alli, this is a big step up for me, I can't let the chance go" He said gently. Cameron let out a small sigh._

"_I know, I know, but what about me Rob? What am I meant to do? It's all well and good for you; you'll have your dream job. Do you expect me to just leave everything here, drop everything for you just like that and move to Chicago?"_

"_You can get a job there. You'll be able to get a job easily"_

"_But what if I don't want to move? I'm happy here, we had a good thing"_

"_And we can carry on having a good thing. Do you really want to stay working in the ER? You can do so much better, you know you can" Chase smiled, gently stroking her cheek, encouraging her to look up at him but her eyes remained firmly on the floor._

"_I...I can't just leave, not yet, not after what has gone on" She said quietly. Chase dropped his hand and took a small step back._

"_This is about House isn't it?" he accused._

"_What? No! When the hell did I mention House? He has nothing to do with anything" Cameron replied, her voice rising slightly. _

"_Oh don't play stupid with me Allison, I know you still have a thing for him" Chase's voice now also beginning to rise._

"_What the fuck Rob? How many times do I have to tell you, I love you, not him. Ever since we started this relationship you've never let it go. You're the only one who ever brings the subject up, the only one who feels the need to turn every little thing into a big deal. I can't believe you're being so insecure"_

"_Then why won't you move to Chicago with me?"_

"_Because you're asking me to give up my life here in less than a month. I need time. I'm settled here, I enjoy working here. I can't be certain that I'll be happy in Chicago. It's fine for you, you have your job but you can't just expect me to follow you just like that."_

_It was now Chase's turn to pace around, his hand running through his golden hair. "That's the thing with relationships, it's about taking risks together and you've never done that with me"_

"_Well sorry but after getting hurt on countless occasions you start to get a little wary" Cameron replied, a hint of sarcasm in her voice as tears began to form in her eyes. A small sigh escaped her lips. "I can't do it Rob...I'm sorry" she added, her voice barely a whisper._

_Chase stopped pacing and turned to face her. "Well I guess that's it then. Lucky you kept the lease on your apartment, it was almost like you knew this wouldn't last" he said bitterly._

"_Rob..."_

"_I don't want to hear it, just...just take your stuff and get out" He said, turning away again, his eyes showing a mixture of pain and anger. _

_Cameron nodded and silently collected her things, wiping away the stray tear that had run down her cheek._

_-_

Cameron wasn't surprised to find that her eyes were once again burning with bitter tears. They had only exchanged a few words as she left their apartment but they were meaningless to her now. Her mind went back to what Foreman had told her a couple of years ago. They had been in the lab, talking about commitment and Cameron began to think that maybe he had been right. She had thought that her relationship with Chase would prove him wrong, prove that she didn't have any commitment issues, but even though she accepted his marriage proposal, the move to Chicago which would well and truly seal the deal she just couldn't do. Fear had gripped her, holding her in its cold grasp, showing no sign of release.

A glance at the clock told her that she really needed to get some sleep. Another sigh, she closed her eyes, starting the impossible task of shutting her mind off and drifting into a restless sleep.

* * *

**A/N:** Don't worry House fans, the caned blue-eyed sarcastic God will make himself known in the next chapter as will his all time nemesis...clinic patients.


	2. Chapter 2

It wasn't every day that the nurses attending the clinic were surprised by the actions of a certain Dr. House but seeing him walk in on time for his shift with what could almost be described as a smile on his face caused a few raised eyebrows.

"I say he's high" One murmured to the other.

"Nah, even if he was high he'd still be avoiding the clinic like the plague. I say recent events have finally got to him, I mean how many times has the guy almost died in the past month? His brain is probably fried, gone completely insane" The other replied.

"True. Either that or he's got laid" The first shrugged before both seemingly got back to work as the man in question neared the station.

"Gooood morning ladies. Dr. House checks in, on time, please note that down. Which delightful sick person am I curing first?" He asked while fumbling through the pile of folders, looking for something vaguely interesting, consequently knocking the first few onto the floor.

"Patient waiting in exam room 2" The first nurses replied curtly, handing him one of the fallen folders, obviously irritated by his behaviour.

"Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning" He answered as he took the file off the nurse as well as fishing out a red lollipop from the pot beside him "and I thought you're job was to create a warm welcoming atmosphere to help reassure the poor little patients" He added before making his way to the exam room receiving a sigh from the nurse.

* * *

"So let me get this straight, you came here because your leg bruised up after hitting it against a coffee table?" House asked, staring at the man in front of him in amazement.

"That's right" The patient nodded.

"Did it occur to you that the bruise may have appeared because, wait for it...you hit your leg against a coffee table"

"Well yeah, at first, but then I did some research..."

"Oh god..." House mumbled under his breath as he held his head in his hand. This was exactly why he hated the clinic; too many people convinced that they could play doctor because of what they had read on the internet.

"...and it turns out that unexplained bruising can be a sign of internal bleeding or cancer so I thought I should get it checked out"

"Yes, the important word in that sentence being _unexplained_."

"Well obviously the coffee table incident could explain it, but what if it was just a coincidence?"

"A coincidence that a small bruise appeared the exact same time and in the exact same place as where you hit your leg?" House's patience was beginning to run thin as he told himself to tell Cuddy that all patients should complete an idiot test before being allowed into the clinic.

"Exactly"

"You know what I think, I think..."

Luckily for the patient Cuddy chose that moment to interrupt, cutting off House's intended insults.

"House, what the hell are you doing?!" She yelled. House looked up at her innocently.

"Why I do believe I'm working my hours in the clinic" He replied calmly. Cuddy stared at him in disbelief, the one time she didn't ask him to do his clinic hours, and he turned up.

"I told you to help out in the ER. They can't cope down there, there's been a major pileup on the highway and you know they're understaffed"

"Well it isn't my problem that this hospital can't sort out staffing issues, that's the job of...wait...I think it may actually be your job"

"House! If you don't get your ass down to the ER now I will shove your cane so far up your..."

"Always with the cane, how am I meant to get over my insecurities if people continuously insist on drawing attention to my crippled status" House replied, faking offence, his bottom lip quivering. "And anyway, if you hadn't noticed, I have a patient who may need serious medical attention"

"What's wrong with him?" Cuddy asked, taking note of the patient for the first time since barging in.

"He has a bruise"

"House..."

"Yeah yeah, got it, the ER needs me and my amazing medical abilities, don't get your panties in a twist" House cut off, irritated, before walking out leaving Cuddy watch him blankly as he headed towards the ER. She had intended to take things easy when it came to House, she knew he was hurting even if he did everything possible to hide it and the last thing she wanted was to help trigger him off into a deeper depression. Letting out a sigh she hoped Wilson would at least talk to him when he came back from compassionate leave otherwise she dreaded to think what state he'd be in.

* * *

Making his way to the ER, House was annoyed. Yes Cuddy had asked him to help out in the ER but truth was, since starting work again he had avoided the ER more than the clinic. He had honestly thought that actually turning up on time to complete his hours would shock the hospital administrator so much that she would find some other doctor to help out in the ER instead of him. As it turned out his plan had backfired on him, not only did he still have to go to the ER, he had now spent unnecessary time dealing with idiotic clinic patients when his time could've been much better spent sleeping in his office.

As he neared his destination the sounds of chaos found its way to his ears. He let out a groan, it was too familiar, the sounds of nurses and doctors shouting to each other over cacophony of tears and screams that only a major crash could produce. Visions of that night flashed before him, that night that caused everything in his life to crumble. This was where it had started...well, the bar was where it had officially started, but the ER was fresher in his mind, in his head this was where events had started to take a turn for the worse.

"At least it's not all bad" he said under his breath as his eyes found the blonde haired figure of Allison Cameron rushing around and trying the impossible task of keeping all the patients calm and happy as they waited for treatment. Taking a deep breath he stepped inside, letting himself become enveloped in the madness.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks for the reviews so far. **

**In response to sunny78's comment about a chapter in Welsh, I may put a bonus chapter at the end where I'll put a translation chapter up, see how things go, have to finish this first. **

**It's looking like it's going to be around 20 chapters, I just need to work out how I'm ending it and then I'm sorted...always have problems with the endings...Anyhow, hope you enjoy this chapter :)**

* * *

It was definitely turning into one of those days as Cameron tried to organise the chaos occurring in the ER. The little sleep she had got the night before was troubled at best and this really was the last thing she needed. Suppressing a yawn, she got back to the task in hand; cleaning up a head wound before stitching it up. She hesitated. The last time she was in a situation like this it had been House's head she had been attending to that night of the bus crash. Since Amber's death she hadn't seen him much, in fact, she hadn't really seen him at all. She was worried about him, from all accounts he wasn't taking the recent events too well, though how much of what she heard was true and how much was just the nurses blowing things out of proportion she didn't know. A part of her had wanted to go and see him, another reminded her that she was over him and it was no longer her place to see him, the latter had won.

Finishing stitching up the wound, she referred the patient to a nurse for some final checks before he could leave and turned to go to the next patient. As she turned, her eyes met the striking blue orbs of the man who had just been in her mind. From the look on his face he was here against his will, most likely on Cuddy's orders. Ignoring the fact her heart had decided to wake up and beat profoundly against her rib cage, she walked towards him, neither sets of eyes leaving the other.

In fact, House's eyes hadn't left Cameron's form since he saw her working relentlessly to restore some order amongst patients and doctors alike. All around him patients cried in loss, pain, despair, but he didn't want to look at them, didn't want to be reminded further of that night, so he kept them focused on Cameron as she stitched up some guys head. She looked tired, exhausted even, but it wasn't just physical, she looked emotionally exhausted and House could give a pretty good guess as to why that was. Still, he had to admire her efforts to carry on with her life as normal, ever the martyr. When she turned, her eyes finally meeting his, he tried to ignore the connection that formed, the familiarity, but without much luck. Even though he hated to admit it, he needed some familiarity right now, needed something stable in his life.

"Are you just going to stand there or are you actually going to help out?" Cameron's voice interrupted his thoughts, her figure now directly in front of his, a small smile present on her face.

"Well it seems like you have it all under control, no need for a poor cripple like me" he replied, tapping his cane lightly against the floor a couple of times out of habit.

"Right. I'm guessing Cuddy sent you here"

House scowled "It's true, the devils' mistress did send me here, even sent me away from her beloved clinic. I think hormones are starting to get to her; her fun bags did look more perky than usual. Maybe I should prepare some fortifications; the spawn of Cuddy can only mean living hell for me."

Cameron laughed. It was only a small laugh but House had to try hard to contain his smile, he never thought he'd miss the sound of a simple laugh, the sound of her laugh. She looked at him, seeing the glimpse of sadness in his eyes.

"You look tired" he stated before she could question him further. Cameron shifted slightly.

"Well cleaning up after a crash can do that to you" she replied "not all of us can spend the day sleeping in their office, some of us do work around here." She added with a small grin.

"I do work" House answered, feigning hurt and receiving another smile from Cameron. "I hear lover boy is off to Chicago" he pressed.

Cameron sighed; she should've known House would find out about that. "Got offered a better job...better pay" she answered "all that's important to him, how much he's getting paid" she added quietly, looking down.

House's interest increased with her last sentence. "So you're not going with?" he asked, eyebrow raised. "Thought you'd follow him everywhere, get a house with a white picket fence, a dog, kids, live happily ever after."

"Well that just proves how little you know me" Cameron replied bitterly, not in the mood to talk about her failing relationships with the older doctor. House didn't respond, his eyes now firmly fixed on his feet.

"Look House, I have to get back to work, I suggest you do the same if you don't want Cuddy breathing down your neck" Cameron said, glancing at the number of patients still waiting to be treated.

"Last time I was here, you were treating me" House mumbled quietly and Cameron almost missed it under the sound of the ER.

"I know" she replied just as quietly. With that, House gave a nod and to Cameron's surprise began to treat a patient. She watched him briefly. He was hurting, she could see that, but then so was she.


	4. Chapter 4

**Again, thank you for all the reviews, I appreciate it. I'm trying to get as many chapters in as possible before I go back to university at the end of the month, can't see myself being able to update at this rate when I get back to work but hopefully I'll have most of it done.**

**In response to some comments I've been receiving, I did intend my other fic (Misconceptions) to be a oneshot so I doubt I'll add to it but we'll see, I might have a change of heart.**

* * *

House was sitting in his darkened office throwing his red and grey ball at the wall in frustration. After dealing with patients in the ER he had escaped both Cameron and Cuddy in preference for brooding in his now second home. He hated how much effect the ER had on him, hated the fact he was reminded how he hurt the people around him...again, hated how he was reminded that he was left alone...again, but most of all he hated how a simple laugh, a simple smile on Cameron's face made him forget for a moment that he was a lonely miserable middle-aged man. He refused to admit that she could do that to him. Throwing the ball a little bit harder in aggravation, it bounced out of his reach, rolling towards his office door. Letting out a sigh, he pulled out the next best thing to relieve his tension; a bottle of scotch.

"At least I know where I stand with you, you're not gonna try and fix me and go pitying me, and I'm not gonna think about jumping you, it's all good" He muttered, taking a swig from the bottle after deciding a glass was unnecessary, it would only delay the inevitable. He had every intention to forget everything.

* * *

After the scene in the ER had calmed down Cameron had taken a well earned break. House was long gone and to be honest she couldn't blame him. He seemed almost uncomfortable whilst he dealt with the patients, his sarcastic comments not nearly as convincing or commanding as she was used to. Finishing yet another coffee, she sighed, she wasn't meant to feel like this, that chapter of her life had been closed long ago now, yet here she was, opening the pages once again and letting the torrent of emotions replay in her head.

It was almost the end of the day when Cameron finally gave into the concern for her ex-boss. As she waited for the elevator doors to open she reminded herself that she was only going to walk past his office, make sure he was relatively in one piece and then she would go home. That was the plan anyway.

The chime of the elevator announced the door opening and Cameron walked down the familiar hallway to the even more familiar office, ignoring the sense of nostalgia bubbling away inside her. Her original plan however of just casually walking past the glass walls of House's office was rendered useless as she discovered that the blinds were drawn. Hand hovering above the door handle, she was torn between taking a quick look and just going home. Ignoring the fact her head was screaming at her to go, her hand grasped the cool metal firmly and she slowly pushed the door open.

The smell of liqueur immediately greeted her and her eyes met the slumped form of her ex-boss at his desk.

"Oh god..." she mumbled to herself, quickly making her way over to him. She quickly realised that he was asleep but that didn't diminish her concern for him. "House" she said firmly, gently shaking him "House wake up"

A few more commands later and Cameron was greeted by the sound of a low groan as House's head slowly rose from the polished wood of his desk. Half opening his eyes, he looked at the intruder who woke him up from his slumber and groaned once again.

"I was asleep" He slurred.

"You're drunk" Cameron stated, the smell of alcohol even stronger on his breath and his eyes bloodshot.

"Yes I am" House smiled, looking rather proud of himself until he tried to sit up and was welcomed by the sensation of the room spinning and decided that keeping his head down was much better. Cameron sighed.

"Come on, I'll take you home" she said. House tried to look at her again.

"You're annoyed" He muttered, his speech slow as he tried to form the words "you're all clenched up, I don't like when you clench, makes me clench and things get all charged."

"I'm not annoyed, just...tired" Cameron sighed again. "Just be grateful Cuddy didn't find you like this"

"Nah, she'd love it. A sexy doctor like me too drunk to defend his honour, she'd jump at the chance to reproduce her evil species. The hospital will be filled with caned breasts...hmm, actually, maybe you're right, Cuddy finding me won't be good"

Cameron shook her head, a small smile playing on her lips. "Well come on Mr. sexy doctor, let's get you out of here" she grinned, offering her arm to help him up. Taking it, House slowly got up, leaning heavily against the younger doctor as she handed him his cane. He hesitated.

"Cameron...you don't have to...last time...last time this happened, Amber..." he started quietly, his eyes firmly on the floor. Cameron's eyes softened.

"House that wasn't your fault" she replied, tightening her grip around him, encouraging him to lean more against her. House just nodded and slowly made his way to the door whilst also tightening his grip around the other doctor.

Nothing was said during the walk to Cameron's car, House concentrating too much on not falling over and Cameron concentrating on keeping as much of House's weight off his bad leg as possible. Once in the car, House's head slumped against the passenger window and fell almost immediately asleep. Cameron looked at him, watched as he seemed almost in peace. It made such a change to see him so relaxed, so out of pain. A few seconds later she started the car and drove to his apartment.

House had remained fast asleep throughout the journey and waking him up required more effort than back at his office.

"You have pretty eyes" He mumbled as he finally woke. Cameron rolled up said eyes.

"I would say the same to you but they're all red and bloodshot due to the amount of drink you've drunk" she replied. "Now are you going to get out of the car?" she asked.

"Need help"

Cameron sighed and got out to help him. Slowly they made their way to his apartment door where House fumbled for his keys, insisting on checking Cameron's pockets before she slapped his hands away. Finally finding them, Cameron helped him to his bed, silently getting him a glass of water and placing it with his vicodin bottle on the table beside him.

"Right, well I'm gonna go, just sleep it off ok" she said, looking down at the still fully clothed figure lying on top of the bed covers.

"Sleep easier if I had someone here with me"

"Nice try but you've proved that you're quite capable of falling asleep on your own" Cameron smiled. "Good night House" she added before making her way to the door.

"Cameron"

She stopped and turned to face him once again.

"I...I'm gonna need a lift in tomorrow" he said.

"Well I'll be going in early, it'll probably be easier for you to get a cab" Cameron replied.

"I'll get up"

"Ok, well I'll be here at seven thirty, if you're not up you'll have to get a cab, I'm not gonna go to work late just because you couldn't get up because of a hangover."

House nodded. "Thank you" he said quietly. Cameron smiled, just catching his thanks, and gave him a nod before departing, leaving House to stare at the spot she stood before his eyes closed once again.


	5. Chapter 5

As Cameron pulled up outside House's apartment the next morning she didn't hold any expectation of House actually being up and ready to go, nevertheless, stranger things had happened. Turning off the engine she sat there for a moment mulling things over in her head. Her sleep the night before had mirrored the previous night and the dark circles under her eyes showed evidence of that, despite her efforts to conceal them. The split with Chase was still hurting her and she was mentally kicking herself for thinking that it would be different to every other relationship she had been in, excluding her husband. Her husband was the only person who had put her first in their relationship. He married her to protect her, to make sure what little money he had would be given to her. Despite his worsening health he was determined to do that for her. No other relationship came close to that dedication. On the face of it sure they seemed to give her the world but deep down it was always themselves who came first, their job, money, they would never sacrifice that for her happiness.

A warm bitter tear trickled down her cheek which she swiftly wiped away. Taking a few deep breaths to compose herself she knew it was her tiredness that was making her more prone to emotion. Happy she had pulled herself together; she stepped out of her car and made her way to the door of House's apartment. Three loud knocks, she stepped back a little and glanced at her watch. She would give him ten minutes and then she was leaving without him.

Seven minutes twenty four seconds (yes she was counting that accurately) and a few additional knocks later a rather dishevelled looking House opened the door. Cameron had to hold back a laugh as she viewed him, his appearance almost comical. He was wearing the same clothes as last night telling her that he probably hadn't woken up since she left him. His hair sticking up in random places added to the 'just-got-out-of-bed' look, as did his slightly watery eyes and extra growth of facial hair. In Cameron's eyes it was almost sexy, a thought she quickly dismissed.

"Someone better be dying" House said, his voice more gruff than usual "actually, forget that, there better be at least ten people dying"

"No one dying...well that I'm aware of anyway. I'm just following orders, you did ask me to pick you up this morning, or were you too drunk to remember?" Cameron asked, a small playful smile on her lips.

House let out a low groan. "You are far too cheery for this time in the morning" He grumbled, opening the door further as an invite to come in. "Give me ten minutes" he added, limping to his bedroom.

Cameron couldn't help but smile as she watched him disappear; surprised he didn't just close the door in her face. Hearing the faint sounds of the shower being switched on, she took the opportunity to look around his apartment, anything to take her mind off the fact that a few doors down House would be standing, naked, water dripping down his body.

"Pull yourself together Allison, you're over him remember" she mumbled to herself as her hand lightly traced the polished wood of his piano. Not wanting to snoop too much, she'd never live it down if she was caught, she made her way to the kitchen, her body almost in automatic as she made him coffee. She never admitted it but she had always liked that part of her routine when she worked for him.

As she poured a cup for both him and her, the man himself made his entrance looking just a little more presentable than before.

"Gimme" he said, reaching out for his mug of coffee and taking a large mouthful.

"How's the hangover?" Cameron asked. House groaned.

"Feels like someone has taken a drill to my head, though I'm sure I'd be feeling much better if a certain someone didn't wake me up" he replied, his voice still a little hoarse.

"Well you practically begged me to pick you up and I did warn you"

"I was drunk. You could've told me to confess my undying love to nurse grumpy at the clinic and I would've done it"

"Well I'll bear that in mind next time" Cameron grinned. House just glared at her, finishing off his coffee.

* * *

The journey to the hospital was spent mostly in silence, House trying to recover from his hangover so when Cuddy inevitably shouted at him it wouldn't feel like ten nuclear bombs had been detonated in his head. When Cameron parked the car, a little closer to the hospital entrance than normal, House decided to speak up.

"Why did you come up to my office last night?" He asked. Cameron shut the engine off, contemplating her answer; she knew he would ask at some point, it was a puzzle for him; everything was a puzzle for him.

"I just wanted to thank you for helping out earlier, I knew you didn't want to be there" she shrugged. House studied for a moment obviously not completely happy with her answer but giving a nod and stepping out the car he decided to accept it for now, plenty of time to probe a little deeper after his headache had subsided.

As Cameron locked her car her day suddenly went from good to very bad.

"I knew it!"

Both Cameron and House turned towards the voice to see a very annoyed Australian storm up to them.

"I knew it was about him all along. How stupid do you think I am Allison? Giving me this shit excuse about not moving with me because it was too rushed for you, that you can't commit because you were afraid of getting hurt, you had to take things slow...it was all about him. So what, you've been sleeping with him? How long has this been going on? Were you seeing him when you were with me?"

"Robert shut up, you're jumping to conclusions, there's nothing going on!" Cameron replied "House just needed a lift into work this morning; he got a bit drunk last night"

"And you expect me to believe that?"

"Rob, do you really think I'd sleep with someone behind your back? You really think I'm that sort of person?" Cameron asked, hurt evident in her voice.

"Well what am I meant to think, you split up with me when you realise you'll have to move and two days later I see you coming to work together"

"Can you two please stop with the shouting, major hangover here." House winced, rubbing his temple. Both Cameron and Chase stared at him forgetting he was still there in their screaming match. "Look, Chase, nothing is going on and even if there was it's now no longer your business. To be honest, if you can't trust Cameron of all people she doesn't deserve you anyway. I mean look at her, she's the depiction of all things good and innocent."

"Thanks" Cameron replied dryly.

"No problem. Now I don't know about you, but I'm gonna go to my office and sleep for a few hours" House added before making his way to the hospital entrance leaving Cameron to watch his departing figure, thoughts speeding around in her head.

"I'm sorry Allison" she heard Chase say quietly. Letting out a small sigh, she turned back to face him.

"No, I'm sorry Rob, I mean what were you meant to think."

"I'm probably going to move to Chicago early, there's nothing really keeping me here now. I finish work here at the end of the week"

Cameron nodded. "You'll do good there" she smiled.

"Keep in touch" Chase said, leaning and placing a gentle kiss on her cheek before also making his way into the hospital. Cameron leant against the body of her car, running her hand through her hair. She felt exhausted and wanted more than anything to go home, curl up with a glass of wine and just forget about everything but she still had a full day's work to do and for some reason, she just couldn't see it going smoothly.

* * *

**So there we go, chapter 5. I'm not really happy with it, too many 'out-of-character' slips for my liking but I've fiddled with it enough now. Hopefully I didn't over do it on the Chase thing. I don't have anything against him, honest, but he has shown a few times in season 4 how insecure he gets with the House/Cameron thing and I just wanted to relate that. Anyway, let me know what you think.**


	6. Chapter 6

To Cameron's surprise, and relief, the rest of the morning went by without a hitch and she quietly got on with her work. One of the advantages of working in the ER was it could get so intense that any worries or issues outside of work were put to one side as taking care of patients took full priority. The mornings events were quickly forgotten and Cameron was almost in her own little world, so much so that she didn't notice the man behind her leaning casually against one of the counters, cane beside him as he watched her finish treat a patient.

"Soooo has the wombat always been that insecure or is it a recent thing?" He asked as soon as she had completed. Cameron jumped at the voice and span around to face him.

"For god sake House! Did you have to sneak up on me?" She exclaimed in surprise.

"Now come on Cameron, I know there are some doctors in this hospital who are scared of me but I thought you of all people would be able to cope with my intimidating presence" House smirked sarcastically at her reaction. Cameron rolled up her eyes.

"I didn't see you come in, and you have to admit, usually you do make yourself known as you enter" she replied. House just shrugged, the small smirk on his face still present. "So why are you here anyway?" Cameron asked.

"Brought you this" House answered handing her a take-out cup of coffee.

"Uh, thanks" Cameron replied, a little taken aback as she took the coffee. "Why are you really here?" She asked. House looked at her, feigning offence.

"I'm hurt that you suspect my actions. I thought after this morning you could do with a coffee, so like the kind, generous and thoughtful person that I am, I brought you one...The fact that Cuddy is currently looking for me and the ER is one of the last places she'll look has nothing to do with it" he grinned. Cameron couldn't help but grin back, seeing any type of smile on House was rare, especially recently, but then annoying Cuddy was one of his favourite hobbies.

"Well thanks anyway" she replied taking a sip of the warm drink, letting the much needed caffeine take effect.

Truth was House had wanted to come down anyway. After the earlier confrontation with Chase his head had been mulling over a number of things, meaning his intended couple of hours of deep sleep turned out to be fifty minutes of light slumber. The way he saw it, Chase must have had a reason to jump to the conclusion he did, no way was the guy that insecure. Also, his reaction and words hinted that he had had something to do with the breakup, well in Chase's opinion at least. It all pointed to the idea Cameron must have done or said something that gave the idea that she wasn't in fact over him. House was surprised that he actually felt comforted by that fact. It was a constant in his life that Cameron had feelings for him and over the past year that constant had seemingly disappeared. She had moved on with Chase and made it perfectly clear that she didn't miss him, but now the idea that this wasn't true and that that constant in his life had remained constant offered a calming reassurance that there was at least one thing in his life that hadn't changed. Of course, this was still pure speculation; he still needed to hear it from her, and if that happened, what he should do next was still causing him problems.

"Chase's reaction earlier..."House started, moving the conversation back to where he wanted it.

"I know. I'm so sorry about that House, I didn't expect him to be so juvenile" Cameron interrupted.

"Why didn't you go to Chicago with him? Could've been a good thing" he stated.

"I don't think it's any of your business"

"Well since Chase seems to think you didn't go because of me, I think it is my business" House countered, taking a small step closer to her. Cameron sighed, her eyes focused on the floor.

"He was asking me to give up my life here just like that, he didn't think about how I'd feel, ask my opinion, he just assumed...I couldn't take that risk with him, I've been hurt too many times..." she replied. House shook his head.

"You didn't go because don't love him, if you loved him it wouldn't matter how many times you'd been hurt, you'd still take that risk"

Cameron's eyes shot up to meet his "That's not true" she answered getting slightly irritated by his analysing "if that was the case, why didn't you take that risk with Stacy when she came back? You can't tell me you didn't love her, I could see how much you loved her"

"That's different" House said, his eyes now avoiding hers.

"How?" Cameron asked, hands on hip.

House never thought he'd be happy to see Cuddy walk in but right now the sight of the hospital administrator made him breathe out in relief.

"House, you were meant to be in the clinic forty minutes ago! If you don't get over there in the next five minutes your hours are going to find themselves doubled" she ordered.

"Yes mom" he replied, rolling up his eyes at Cameron before following the administrator out of the ER.

"House" Cameron called before he left. House stopped and turned around. "Thanks for the coffee anyway" she smiled.

"Yeah, well, I'm gonna need one after I get this over and done with" he grumbled before leaving, still a little annoyed that he had let her twist the conversation towards him. One thing was for sure, she wasn't the naive innocent woman he hired all those years ago, and despite her uncomfortable questions, it pleased him.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks again for the reviews. Had some time to finish this chapter so you're lucky enough to have a quick update. I can't say the medical stuff in this chapter is completely correct, I'm a physicist not a doctor, but I have researched a little so it should be accurate enough for the purpose. Hope you enjoy anyway, things will be starting to get interesting in the next few chapters.**

* * *

House sat at his desk staring at the list of symptoms written on the white board he had moved into his office. After being dragged into the clinic he had then been dragged back out after being assigned a case, much to his relief. Twirling his cane in his right hand he considered the symptoms again, something wasn't adding up. It wasn't helping matters that a certain immunologist was making herself known in his thoughts. He had definitely underestimated her earlier, a part of him forgetting how much she had developed during the years. He hated how not knowing exactly how she felt about him was bugging him so much. Of course, he refused that the reason why he needed to know to be anything other than answering a puzzle. Truth was, he had missed her presence during differentials, missed how she would sort through his mail every morning, missed how he would enter his office and fine a mug of coffee waiting for him. That was what really bugged him. She was meant to be missing him, not the other way round.

As if fate itself was plotting against him, the woman in question appeared at his door, calmly walking in. House stopped spinning his cane and placed it beside him as he watched her approach.

"Checking the clinic didn't make me suicidal?" he asked, leaning back slightly in his chair.

"Brought you this" Cameron smiled, handing him a cup of coffee identical to the one he had brought her earlier. "You said you'd need one after clinic so like the kind, generous and thoughtful person that I am, I brought you one...The fact that a party has just been brought into the ER with food poisoning and I didn't fancy being vomited on has nothing to do with it" she grinned, mimicking House's own earlier excuse. He grinned back at her.

"Thanks" He said taking the coffee.

"Tough case?" Cameron asked, looking at the board.

"All my cases are tough" House shrugged "not easy food poisoning and head wounds like the ER get" he added. Cameron glared at him. "What? It's true" he defended.

Cameron ignored him and read the symptoms on the board instead. "Could be Crohn's" she suggested.

"Already thought about it, test came back negative. My lackeys are in the process of testing for intestinal infections" House replied. Cameron considered the board again.

"What about Celiac Disease? Would explain the unexplained anaemia, abdominal pain and fatigue" she said after a moment.

"But wouldn't explain why she's currently dying, also it's genetic, no mention of it in either parents history"

"Just because there's no mention doesn't mean they don't suffer from it, symptoms for Celiac's don't always make themselves known, and since when have you started to trust patient's histories anyway?" Cameron countered "As for the dying thing, Celiac Disease results in greater chance of developing Adenocarcinoma. Cancer fits."

House looked at her intently before picking up his phone. "Test her IgA, tTGA and AEA levels in her blood and biopsy her colon...yes for cancer, what else you idiot" He put down the phone and looked back at Cameron. "You're wasted in the ER you know that right" he said. "Not that I'm saying you're right, an infection fits just as well"

Cameron just smiled and shrugged. House leant back in his chair once again, observing her thoughtfully.

"What if you come back and work here" he suggested.

"House... you've already tried this once. I left for a reason" Cameron replied. House shook his head.

"I offered for you to come back into your old position, now that'll never work as it requires one of my team to be sacked and you'll be too guilt ridden to do any work. I'm not offering that now. I'm offering for you to come back as a sort of partner say. Obviously I'll still be boss of you but you'll get a say in what cases we take, get to order the team." He explained. Cameron considered the man in front of her for a moment.

"Why do you want me back?" she asked. House sighed, knowing he should've expected that question.

"I need someone here who actually cares about the patients. My team are idiots, don't argue with me enough and care more about looking good to me than the person they treat. Foreman doesn't want to be here, I'm not that stupid not to notice him looking for other vacancies, once he finds something he's out of here. You've just proven that you still have the ability to think outside the box and you can't deny that this is more exciting than the ER" he answered.

Now it was Cameron's turn to sigh. "House, don't get me wrong, I'm really flattered by the offer but I did leave for a reason like I said. It's true, sometimes I miss the excitement here, the challenge, but I don't miss the extra stress it caused me, the rollercoaster of emotions...I have to move on from this job" she replied, looking anywhere but at him. "Anyway, I better get back to the ER, only said I'd be away for a few minutes" she added before hastily turning to leave.

House nodded and watched deep in thought as the younger doctor made her way out, there was something she wasn't telling him.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I know season 5 is now up and running but as far as this fic is concerned it doesn't exist. I came up with the plot before season 5 started and I see it as my version of how things go after the end of season 4, I'm not going to change things to fit the real version. Basically, I'm not making Wilson leave, though the tension is still there. Anyway, hope you enjoy this chapter; things are going to start to heat up now :)**

* * *

It had been a few days since House had offered Cameron a job and he still didn't know exactly what had prompted him to do it. Of course he thought she was wasted in the ER but to offer her a job, again, and as a partner no less had been an impulse decision and Gregory House never acted on impulse; he always had to weigh up every option, have solid reasons behind him. He had found himself in the young immunologists company more regularly over the last week and even he couldn't deny that the banter had been comfortable. In fact the ER had become his new hiding place from Cuddy and the clinic, despite the occasional flashbacks he got whilst he was down there. He said it was because of convenience, he had a number of excuses available to him to tell Cuddy for being there instead of the clinic; he was down there for a consult, he was looking for cases...Cameron never believed him.

This morning however House was going down for a different reason. Leaning against a wall he watched as Cameron stitched up a boy's arm, offering him some comfort as she did so and managing to stop him from crying. House was surprised to find a small smile appearing on his face, a smile he quickly got rid of. If Cameron, or anyone for that matter, saw him smiling for no apparent reason he'd never live it down.

"Avoiding clinic again?" Cameron smiled as she passed him and headed towards the nurses' station with the boys file.

"Nope" House replied, following her "avoiding the pile of paperwork on my desk" he added. Cameron looked at him for a moment, she knew that was a lie, he never went out of his way to avoid paperwork; he'd just get one of his team to do it, or just watch it pile up.

"So it has nothing to do with the fact Wilson is back today and you want to avoid him?" she asked with a raised eyebrow. House looked away from her and Cameron got her answer. "You can't avoid him forever House" she sighed "you two need to talk"

House looked at her, his face expressionless, and noticed the dark rings around her eyes, her skin slightly paler than usual. "You're not sleeping" he stated.

"And you're changing the subject" Cameron replied, a little thrown off by the fact he noticed.

"Fine, I need to talk to Wilson. I'll get right on it." House answered sarcastically. "Why aren't you sleeping?" he asked. Cameron sighed and glanced over at the nurses at the station who had not very subtly stopped their conversation and were now trying to give the impression that they were carrying on with their work whilst throwing her the occasional look.

"Apparently my split with Robert is big enough to be the main topic of hospital gossip." She mumbled under her breath and House understood. He knew the split had hurt her, even if she was the one who initiated it, and having wild rumours about it go around the hospital wouldn't exactly help.

"Want me to sort it?" he asked, already planning how to go about his task, he was always looking for an excuse to berate nurses. Cameron smiled and shook her head as she saw the excitement in his eyes.

"You have more important things to do, like going up and talking to Wilson." She replied. House sighed.

"You're no fun" he pouted.

"Come on, get out" she smiled, playfully hitting him on the arm with her next patients' folder "some of us have work to do"

"Fine" House said giving her another pout before limping off, leaving Cameron to watch him with a smile.

* * *

House stood outside the wooden door of his friends' office, hesitating slightly. He didn't know what Wilson's reaction towards him would be, he didn't even know if he blamed him for Amber's death. Not bothering to knock, he entered the room, finding the oncologist sitting at his desk catching up with paper work. He didn't even glance up to see who had walked in, knowing who it was.

"You're back then" House said, breaking the silence as he stood in front of him.

"Nice to see that your powers of observation haven't deserted you" Wilson replied, his eyes still not lifting from his work. House looked around, a little uncomfortable; he didn't deal with these situations. Tapping his cane subconsciously on the floor, he thought about what to say.

"I'm..."

"You're what House?" Wilson asked, finally looking up at him. "You're sorry? Cause if that's the case I don't want to hear it"

"I risked my life to save her" House replied, feeling the need to remind the other doctor that fact.

"I know, and you know what House, I'm actually grateful for that but you didn't do it to save her, you didn't even like her, you did it because you felt the need to make up for your mistake. I don't blame you for her death, but I'm sure as hell not going to tell you that we're ok. You have always pushed this friendship, always pushed to see when it will break, well here it is, it's broken"

House stared at him, his face emotionless before leaving the room, limping straight to his office and locking he door behind him, blinds shut.

* * *

**A/N: I have almost finished writing the next chapter so it should be uploaded later tonight, tomorrow at the latest, if not, you have my permission to write, complain, shout, scream, cry...you get the message... **


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: in response to a comment made by Limaccia about the last chapter. I agree, I didn't make Wilson's reasoning as clear as I would've liked, I hope a few things Cameron says in this next chapter will clear a few things up. **

* * *

House had no idea how long he had been sitting in his office, all he was aware of was it was now dark and his team had gone home. Picking up the glass of scotch that was on his desk, he looked at the dark liquid, watched as the faint light peaking through the blinds glimmered off it. Letting out a small sigh, he brought the glass to his lips and downed the drink in one, letting the alcohol burn as it trickled down his throat. He immediately went to pour another one but found the bottle empty. Mumbling curses under his breath, he didn't remember drinking that much, but then, he didn't really remember a great deal.

Wilson's words had hit deeper than he would've liked and he actually found himself wishing that he did blame him for Amber's death. Guilt was easier to deal with than this, this was hurt and House didn't deal well with hurt, he had always avoided all situations that could lead to hurt. Relationships of any kind were a big no, but Wilson's had always been different, well he had always thought it that way, now he saw that it was just like any other; it ended with him getting hurt.

Frustrated, he knocked the empty scotch bottle to the floor, getting little satisfaction from the sound of shattering glass. He needed to go home, more alcohol awaited him there, and he had every intention to forget everything. Pulling out his phone with the aim to call a cab, he found himself dialling another familiar number.

"Hello?" a tired voice answered.

"I need a lift" House informed, his gruff voice rougher than usual with the alcohol.

"House? What have you done? Where are you?" A now concerned voice asked.

"In my office...been drinking..." House slurred.

"House, I can't bail you out every time you feel the need to drown your sorrows"

"Cameron...please..." he said, not attempting to hide the pain from his voice. A brief pause and a small sigh, Cameron agreed before hanging up.

House placed his phone on the table, staring at it. He was setting himself up to get hurt again, even in this state he knew he was feeling closer to the immunologist, feeling comfortable around her and right now she was the only one to take him as he was. Before, he would say she was trying to fix him, that everything was because he was damaged, but now he wasn't so sure. After Amber's death, she didn't come running to him to console his damaged self; it was Cuddy by his side when he woke up. It was him who sought her out a few weeks later and her unspoken gestures didn't go unnoticed by him either. How she kept the weight off his bad leg when she took him home all those days ago, despite the fact she was already struggling with his weight. How she left a glass of water with his pills at his bedside before she left. How she made him coffee the morning after knowing he would need it. All these little things screamed at him that he was in trouble.

Cameron arrived at his office a little later, walking into the darkened office and up to House's desk. Seeing the broken bottle beside him she sighed, she knew he would be bad but she hadn't been able to judge how bad.

"You're angry" House stated, not taking his eyes off the younger doctor.

"I was woken up to pick you up because you've been drinking...again...of course I'm angry" Cameron replied. House took his eyes off her for the first time, looking intently at the wood grain of his desk. Cameron let out a sigh.

"Let's get you home" she said, her voice warmer. House nodded and stood up. Not realising how drunk he was, the movement caused him the stumble slightly but Cameron there waiting for him placed her arm around him, steadying him. He looked down at her, his piercing blue eyes connecting with hers in silent thanks. Cameron felt her heartbeat quicken at the intense look, internally cursing herself for letting him affect her in such a way. Breaking the gaze first, she handed him his cane and slowly helped him out of his office and towards her car.

The car journey was quiet. House was staring out of the passenger window, his eyes diluted and bloodshot. Cameron frequently threw a concerned glance his way before concentring again on the road. She knew it wasn't a coincidence that the day Wilson came back to work House got ridiculously drunk. Pulling up outside his apartment, she switched off the engine and looked at the older doctor. His gaze still hadn't wavered from the window and he made no indication that he knew he was home.

"House" Cameron said gently "House, we're here"

House nodded, his eyes still not moving. Cameron sighed and got out the car before helping House. He was hurting, and badly.

After some effort, she managed to get House to sit on his sofa and handed him a glass of water. House took the glass and stared at it for a moment.

"Need scotch" he said, placing the water on the table. Cameron sighed again and sat next to him.

"Don't you think you've drunk enough?" she asked.

"Nope"

"What happened House?" Cameron asked softly.

"Nothing's happened. I like scotch so I drink scotch" House replied, irritated.

"Did you see Wilson?" Cameron pressed, ignoring his answer. House's eyes darkened slightly.

"Yes, you happy now! I saw him, he said we're no longer friends, I walked out and drunk. End of story" he replied. "Now can I have more scotch?"

"He'll come round. He just needs time. This was the first time he saw you since Amber's death, it probably brought back bad memories." Cameron tried to reassure.

"Because you're such an expert" House said bitterly "Who have you got Cameron? Chase is off to Chicago and you're left alone again. Seems to me that being nice to people works just as well as being a jerk to people"

Cameron looked away, trying to hide the hurt evident in her eyes. Intentional or not, House had just hit a nerve. Fighting to hide the tears from her eyes and the pain from her voice she replied.

"I was just saying, when my husband died I couldn't...I couldn't even look at my best friends. They didn't even have anything to do with his death but just looking at them, they just reminded me of him. I found myself hating them because they hadn't suffered as much as I did...You need to give Wilson time because right now when he sees you all he'll be reminded of is Amber. He'll remember sooner or later why you were friends"

House looked at her, immediately regretting his earlier words seeing her struggle to hold in her emotion. "Cameron..." he started, trying to get out the words he wanted to say but his body not cooperating. Cameron looked at him, quickly wiping a stray tear.

"I better be going...it's getting late" she said quietly, standing up. A hand circling her wrist stopped her and she looked down at House with a questioning look.

"Stay"

"House..."

"It's late...just...stay"

Cameron studied House's face intently, seeing the vulnerability in his eyes. Letting out a breath she didn't even know she was holding, she nodded and relief flashed across House's face. Standing up, he led her towards his bedroom, his hand still not letting go of her wrist. At the bed Cameron hesitated and House looked at her.

"What? You don't expect me to let you sleep on the sofa do you? Wilson said it was uncomfortable. I'll keep my hands to myself, I promise, just get in" he said, taking off his shirt and climbing into the bed, leaving room for Cameron. Taking off her shoes slowly, she followed him under the covers, trying to switch off the thoughts running through her head. A small smile found its way onto House's face as he switched off the lights, feeling the effects off the alcohol drift him into a content slumber. It took Cameron a little longer to drift off but the night's events and the feeling of House's body heat beside her, she was also soon drifting off to a content sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**Thanks for all the reviews, I appreciate them. I intended to update this a bit quicker but I have a lot on right now and university will be starting again soon so...hopefully once the usual start of term chaos is over I'll get back to updating at a decent time, just don't expect the next chapter to be up in the next few days, it's going to be the turning point of the fic so I don't want to rush it.**

* * *

House woke up the next morning with the mother of all hangovers. Groaning, he slowly opened his eyes, blinking a few times as they adjusted to the light. His clock showed that he would be late for work, nothing unusual there, what was unusual was the fact that next to the orange bottle of vicodin was a glass of water and a propped up piece of paper. Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, he read the familiar feminine, loopy, handwriting.

_Needed at the ER, didn't think you'd appreciate me waking you up. _

_There's coffee in the pot, just reheat it if you want any._

_Hope the hangover isn't too bad._

_Cameron_

House sighed as the previous night's events replayed in his mind. She had stayed with him even though he had hurt her, she was quietly looking after him, caring for him and the scary thing was he couldn't even put it down to her just trying to fix him, it was him who kept going to her. He groaned again, he wasn't in any sort of state to think about it right now. Tipping out two of the white pills into his waiting hand he quickly took them with the water and waited for them to kick in.

* * *

Cameron couldn't deny that the previous night had been the first decent sleep she had had since her breakup with Chase. Getting on with her work, she was feeling refreshed and a small smile was present on her lips. She had woken up that morning to find herself lying considerably closer to House than when she had drifted off to sleep, or rather, he was lying closer to her, she hadn't actually moved much. An arm was draped loosely around her waist, her hand placed gently on top of his. She had taken a few moments to enjoy the feeling, the warmth of his body against hers, the soft sounds of his breathing filling the air. She couldn't possibly wake him. Partly because he looked so peaceful, partly because she didn't know if he would even remember that he had asked her to stay, she didn't quite fancy dealing with a 'morning after' scene. So carefully and regretfully detangling herself from him, she left, but not before making some coffee and leaving a note and a glass of water beside his pills, she never did like him dry swallowing those things.

"Cameron, are you busy?" a familiar voice asked, bringing her out of her thoughts.

"Oh hey Wilson" she replied, facing the oncologist. "No I'm not busy, what's up?"

"I was just wondering if you'd like to get a coffee or something, I...need to get away from my desk for a bit"

"Of course, I could probably do with a break anyway" Cameron smiled. She hadn't had a chance to see Wilson since he had come back and she could guess that it was more like his staff's sympathetic looks he wanted to get away from.

"Cool. Well I'll let you finish off here and I'll see you in the cafeteria"

Cameron nodded and watched as he left. She had intended to see him today anyway. After what House had told her in his drunken state the night before, Wilson was still far from over Amber's death and even though it wasn't her place to mess with the two friend's, well, ex-friend's relationship, a little words here or there couldn't hurt.

She found Wilson sitting at a table in the corner or the cafeteria, two mugs of coffee in front of him. Smiling warmly at him, she sat opposite.

"Hey" Wilson smiled as she sat down "sorry about dragging you away like this, just...it's like people are afraid they'll say something wrong around me, I just needed to get away you know, thought..."

"I'd understand?" Cameron finished. Wilson smiled again and nodded.

"Yeah" he sighed.

"You'll get it for the next couple of weeks or so. People keep telling you that you'll feel better if you talk about it, let your emotion out, that they're there for you, when all you want to do is tell them that you want time to deal with it on your own for a bit and for them to be ok with that. All I can say, when you do want to talk about it, I'm here if you want someone to say something other than 'I'm sorry'" Cameron said with a small smile.

"Thanks" Wilson replied "I hear you split with Chase" he said to change the subject. Cameron sighed.

"Yeah, I think it was coming before the whole moving to Chicago thing. We wanted different things. I'm getting over it...always get over it" she replied quietly. Wilson looked at her for a moment, seeing in her eyes that she was anything but over it. He didn't know much about her past life other than her husband but he'd be stupid to think it had been easy.

"Hear House has spent a lot of his time in the ER too" he pressed cautiously. "Overheard the nurses gossiping" he explained after seeing Cameron's questioning look.

"He's hurting" she answered. Wilson sighed.

"Cameron, just...be careful. House needs someone around, someone to enable him, someone he can use, don't get sucked into that. I know you used to have a...thing for him and you can't deny that after the split with Chase that you're feeling a little vulnerable, feeling alone. I've been there, I know. Just don't get too sucked in. House doesn't care, he needs, he pushes, he hurts. I've learnt it the hard way, I don't want you to fall too" he said seriously. Cameron studied the oncologist.

"Wilson, I know you're hurt by what House did but you can't say he doesn't care. He risked his life for you, he didn't do it for Amber, he didn't do it for himself, he did it for you because he cares, he cares about your friendship, about you." She replied. "If you see him...he's hurting badly. I appreciate your concern but I know what I'm doing"

Wilson sighed again, running his hand through his hair. "I know. When he came to see me yesterday, I could see how hurt he was but I just felt like he didn't have a reason to be hurt, he didn't even like Amber, he shouldn't be hurt. Does that make sense?"

Cameron nodded.

"But I still mean what I said" he carried on "Whatever you have going with House right now, he'll push and it'll end up with one of you if not both of you getting hurt. I don't want to see that happen."

"I know what I'm doing" Cameron repeated "Truth is, I probably need him just as much as he needs me right now and whatever this thing is between us, I'm not going to let him push it away"

Standing at the entrance a lone figure watched the two doctors in their conversation, trying to ignore the pangs of jealousy that filled him. Having enough, he turned and walked away, the two doctors in question completely oblivious that anyone had been there.


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N: I'm so sorry it's taken me forever to update this, a lot has been going on, a lot to deal with, all on top of moving house and starting my second year of university. Hopefully I'll get to update a little quicker from now on, I do have a lot of work due amongst other things but I'll try. Thanks for all of the reviews, I do appreciate them and love reading them. Anyway, enough of me blabbing on, here's the chapter you've all been waiting for. Enjoy.**

* * *

"You left me. I woke up all cold and alone."

Cameron turned from the patients file she was signing to the voice that interrupted her.

"And you would've been happy with me waking you up in the early hours of the morning?" she asked with a raised eyebrow, looking slightly amused at the feigned hurt expression on the other doctor's face. "House, you can't pull off puppy dog eyes with me" she added with a grin. House immediately went back to his normal, emotionless expression.

"They work with Cuddy" he grumbled, looking down and lightly tapping his cane on the floor in thought. Cameron contemplated the man in front of her, there was definitely something on his mind, his eyes now staring intently at the floor and his brow furrowed slightly.

"House?" she prompted quietly, edging on the side of caution.

"You were talking with Wilson"

"I was..." Cameron replied, with a questioning look on her face, not really sure where he was heading.

"Why?" House asked shortly, stopping the tapping of his cane and looking at the woman in front of him closely. He didn't know why but seeing Cameron with Wilson in the cafeteria, the soft caring look that was on her face, had set off a torrent of different emotions. He didn't want to admit that jealousy was one of them, he had no right to be jealous, but there was certainly something, and it unsettled him.

"Just because you're not talking to him right now doesn't mean that I can't." Cameron replied curtly "He's hurting House, he needed someone to talk to, someone who understands just a little of what he's going through and..."

"and you jumped at the chance to care, move onto another charity case, someone else for you to fix" House interrupted sarcastically, suddenly feeling anger build up inside of him.

"What the...No!"

"Did you have a nice chat about how I ruined his life; how all I ever did was make him miserable, how I'm such a burden on everyone's life. I bet he played the concerned card and warned you stay away..."

"Damn it House!" Cameron interrupted, raising her voice slightly, taken aback by the sudden change of behaviour. "Not everything is about you. And even if Wilson did warn me to stay away, I am quite capable of making my own decisions"

"So he did warn you" House stated smugly.

Cameron let out an exasperated sigh "What does it matter if he did or not. Look House I don't know why this is bothering you but I have work to do"

House watched as she turned away from him and began looking through her next patient's file. Feeling his anger disperse, he let out a small sigh. "You should follow his advice" he said quietly.

Cameron turned back to face him at his words only to see his figure limp away towards the exit. Closing her eyes, she ran her hand over her face. He had made no effort to hide the emotion involved in his statement; the deep sadness that he felt day-in-day-out, the regret...Wilson had been right, he was trying to push her away.

* * *

House watched as his fingers traced over the keys of his piano. He didn't apply any pressure, he didn't want to break the silence that surrounded him, but he took comfort from the patterns he made, the combination of notes, the silent tune that played. Beside him on the polished wood grain of the instrument lay an untouched glass of scotch, the deep amber liquid catching the faint light of the room, adding its own contribution to the soundless masterpiece.

A gentle knock at his door cut across his musings and his fingers stopped their movements. He knew who was there; there was no one else it could be. Letting out a sigh he stood up and walked to the door, pausing at the handle. After the jumble of emotions he had felt that day he had no intention to see anyone. Despite this, he felt compelled to open the door and slowly opened it, though only enough so the young immunologist was visible.

"What do you want?" he asked "Expecting a hooker any minute, though now you're here maybe I should cancel" he added sarcastically.

"House, can we talk?" a defeated voice asked, not rising to his sarcastic taunts.

"Nope. Done talking"

"House, please"

"I don't want your sympathy Cameron" House replied, moving to shut the door and restore the barrier between them, the barrier that should never have come close to breaking in the first place.

"You were right" Cameron said quietly as he began to shut the door "Last night, what you said, you were right"

House hesitated and opened the door back to its original position, allowing her to continue.

"Turns out being nice is just as good as being a jerk. I don't have anyone...I never really did" she continued, her eyes firmly on the floor, afraid of what she would see if she looked up. House contemplated the woman in front of him before opening the door fully in a silent invitation to come in. Relieved, she walked in.

"Sit" House motioned at the couch before heading towards the glass of scotch at his piano. Downing the dark liquid, taking comfort in the burning heat down to his stomach he turned back to face the younger doctor and let out another sigh. "Why me Cameron?" he asked, the usual sarcasm absent from his voice. Cameron looked up at him. It was such a loaded question, held so many different meanings, something his eyes confirmed.

"In my past...I was hurt, many times, not physically but emotionally, mentally. People take advantage. Guys would always appear sweet and kind and promise the world but as soon as they got what they wanted from me their true self appeared and I was just left, discarded, wondering what had gone wrong. Me being me, I would always think that the next time would be different...it never was." Cameron started, looking down at her hands "My husband, he was different, he was the first person in my life to put me first, ahead of jobs, money, hobbies...whether it would've been different if he had been healthy I don't know, but..." she paused as House moved to sit beside her. Taking a deep breath she looked from her hands to him. "You, you don't hide the fact that you're damaged, you don't hide who you are, don't hide the fact that you will push and hurt people intentionally and unintentionally. What you see is what you get and I admire that. I never wanted to fix you, why would I when in my opinion there's nothing to fix."

House hadn't taken his eyes from her since she had began talking and now he found himself losing himself in her blue-green eyes, both sets showing their past demons. "I was right all those years ago" he said quietly, breaking the silence between them. Cameron gave him a questioning look. "You are as damaged as you are beautiful" he answered. Cameron didn't get a chance to contemplate his answer as suddenly she felt his hand placed against her cheek, his thumb stroking her soft skin with gentleness she never thought she would experience coming from him. The move had even taken House a little by surprise. Here was a woman who had long ago accepted him for who he was and he didn't know how to deal with it, and so, he did the only logical thing he could think of at that moment...he kissed her.

Leaning in, his lips grazed hers, tentatively at first, testing the waters before instinct kicked in and he deepened the kiss. By this point Cameron had gotten over her initial surprise and was kissing him back with the same amount of eagerness and need. The soothing motions of his tongue against hers made her forget about her past, about Chase, about Wilson, about everything.

Needing air the pair reluctantly broke the kiss, foreheads leaning against the other and their eyes locked in an intense gaze. House could see her eyes searching his eyes for answers, reasons. "Stop thinking" he said quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, and slowly the look in Cameron's eyes relaxed. "Stay" House added. Cameron's eyes widened slightly before breaking contact with his.

"House...I don't think..."

"Cameron I don't know exactly what this is between us and I don't particularly want to think about it right now" House interrupted "but what I do know is that last night when you were here was the first decent night's sleep I've had in a while. It's late, I'm tired so...just stay" he finished.

"Ok" Cameron answered, unable to help mimicking the small smile that had appeared on House's face. It wasn't much, but it was something, and Cameron was more than willing to take that.

* * *

**A/N: I really tried to keep both House and Cameron in character during this chapter but I feel there are some bits that may have slipped a little OOC. Sorry if that's the case, any constructive comments will be appreciated.**


	12. Chapter 12

House sat in his office, once again throwing his ball at the wall in deep contemplation. Like the previous night, Cameron had left by the time he managed to drag himself out of bed but unlike the night before, he had been awake as she left.

* * *

"_Where are you going?" House grumbled as he felt his arm being removed from its place around Cameron's waist. Cameron turned to face him, slightly surprised that he was awake. _

"_I need to go back to my apartment, get ready for work. Some of us actually turn up on time you know" she replied, taking in the image of her ex-boss lying amongst the covers, eyes still closed and hair sticking up in random places. House grumbled something incomprehensible before pulling the covers tighter around him._

"_Make coffee" he added. Cameron rolled up her eyes, a small smile playing on her lips._

"_Already on it" she replied, making her way out of the room, hesitating at the door and turning to take in House's figure once again. Letting out a small sigh she turned back and made her way to the kitchen. She was still none the wiser about what was going on between the two of them but knew it wasn't wise to approach the subject just yet. Making quick work of the coffee, she left the apartment and went about her daily routine._

* * *

"We have a case"

House caught the grey-red ball in his hands and looked at the intruder who interrupted his musings.

"And you're telling me this why?" he asked, taking amusement from watching the confusion that played on his fellows' face.

"Well I just thought, you know, that you'd want to know, seeing it's your job and everything"

House rolled up his eyes. "Blinds shut means daddy doesn't want to be disturbed. Go do whatever tests you see fit and come back when the patient is dying" he dismissed, his attention going back to throwing his ball against the wall. He didn't know how much time had passed when he heard his door open again. He knew he should've locked the thing. Glancing over, he stopped throwing the ball and leant back in his chair, watching, hawk-like, as his once best friend walked closer to his desk.

"Kutner said you were brooding" Wilson spoke, his arms crossed in front of his chest. House let out an amused exhale of breath.

"You'd like that wouldn't you. You just couldn't resist seeing if the great doctor House was feeling sorry for himself after his best friend ditched him" House replied sarcastically "Well I have news for you, not everyone feels sorry for poor doctor Wilson. Some think he should stop basking in the sympathy and actually get over it"

Wilson made no outward sign that his comments got to him and shifted his position slightly. "Actually I just came over to tell you to stop messing with Cameron"

"Why? You have the hots for her? Thinking of making her the next Mrs Wilson? She's damaged enough, you get to have your fix for needy women."

"Just shut the fuck up House!" Wilson interrupted, his anger and irritation plain to see. "This is all a game for you isn't it? You really don't give a damn about what effect you're having. Cameron is vulnerable right now, her split with Chase is hurting her more than she's letting on and now you're going around playing with her emotions. I am not going to let her get hurt by you, not again."

"Right, because I've never had my trust broken before, I don't know what it's like to have my feelings exposed and then torn to pieces, I don't know what it's like to deal with pain. I'm just a liability, not able to talk to anyone without breaking them." House replied bitterly.

"That's not what I'm saying"

"I didn't know I had to run my life by you so you can approve, must've missed that notice. And anyway, why do you care what I do or not do? You made it pretty clear that you don't want anything to do with me, so why don't you go shove you concern back in Oncology where it belongs."

Wilson stared at the other doctor for a moment. His blue eyes were burning with an intensity that he rarely saw. The array of emotions present surprised him. Regret, guilt, anger, hurt...It only then dawned on him why he seemed unusually vulnerable in his emotions.

"You like her. You've fallen for her" he stated. House remained silent giving Wilson the answer he needed. "This is good House, really good." A smile gracing his boyish face for the first time since he entered the room.

"You've changed your tune" House answered, his eyes now focussing on a mark on the carpet beside Wilson's feet.

"I thought you were just playing with her, that this was just a game for you to pass the time, I didn't think you felt anything." Wilson admitted.

"Yeah well, don't go making a big thing about it" House grumbled, getting uncomfortable by the change of conversation.

"So what's going on? Have you told her?" Wilson asked.

"I don't know what I'm doing damn it" House exclaimed, his eyes snapping back to Wilson's, annoyed that he had been so careless in letting his guard down. "I'm not meant to feel like this" He sighed, running his hand through his thinning hair.

"Tell her" Wilson encouraged "It could be good for you, good for both of you. Think about it at least" he added before turning to leave House to his thoughts, aware that he had put his usual guard up again and that he wouldn't get anything else from him.

"Wilson" House called out as he reached the door. Wilson turned around not sure what to expect. "Good to have you back" House said. Wilson smiled and gave him a brief nod before leaving. House stared at the door for a moment before also letting a small smile grace his rugged features. Neither were ones for big flowery apologies when it came to their friendship. An apology was just words, most of the time meaningless. Actions were far more effective and both could see plainly how much the other still cared in their...discussion. House sighed and leant back in his chair until he was looking at the ceiling. Now he just had the issue of Cameron to sort out.


End file.
